OK, so I've been more than a little bummy about getting blogs done. And I'd like to say that it's been because I'm SOOOOO busy, lol! Well it's because I'm so lazy. ;) I've been pretty very lazy, I won't deny that at all!
I feel that for the first time in a very long time I'm O.K. I've had lots of ups and downs these past few years. All in the heart department. And after the 100th time (ok more like 30th time) you get tired of picking yourself up and dusting yourself off and going back out there. I honestly just don't have the umph to do it anymore. Men have sucked the breath out of me when it comes to falling in love and maybe one day living happily ever after. In my opinion if that is what you are waiting for ladies then I suggest that you get a nice book and a comfy chair to sit in because it's not going to happen.
I'm 35, it doesn't get better. I've finally come to the realization that love and marriage is not in the books for me and I'm totally OK with that. I'm not fooling myself. I'm not getting any younger (although the men seem to be acting more like teenagers than real men). And the men lets just touch on that for a moment. None of them know what they want, or what they feel and all they can commit to is a text message. What the hell is that about??
Call me old fashioned but damn, what is wrong with people nowadays?? We are growing up with a generation that can't even communicate! No one can call they have to text, no one can have a date they want to hangout, no one can commit because they are afraid. So it's a generation of idiots growing up around us. Put all the crap away and just be real for a moment! Why is it wrong to go out and get to know someone? Why is everyone so quick to give a phone number out or their address? Why can't you go to dinner and talk for ever and get to know each other? Why does it have to go from text to sex? And look at the roll models for kids today....I guess who can you blame? We are a generation of idiots! That's my frank opinion.
I guess in a way some people may think that I waisted my time. I'm not married, I have no children and what have i done with my life? Well I worked my ass off. And thanks to this lovely economy I have pretty much nothing to show for it. Watch out here sits a perfectly good 35 year old woman all by herself, lol! The up note for that is the fact that I can do what i want when I want and if I want to drink a bottle of wine in the dark I can do so....HA HA!!
There was a short period of time in my life where I though things would be quite different and then I got dumped. From all my years of dating I have battle scars (mainly on my heart) and I have learned the hard lesson that you can truly trust no one but yourself.
For the first time in a very long time I'm really O.K. I've been single for over a year now and I've learned how to do things alone and I really enjoy it. I can't tell you how well I sleep at night knowing that NO ONE is cheating on me or lying to me or going to stand me up at the last minute! I have not had the best time when dating. And I guess it's not for everyone. But I can honestly say for the first time in years.....I DON'T CARE :) I really honestly feel like I can't be tied down. To say the word dating is like blah in my ears! Lol!
I was once told by an ex that I had unrealistic expectations of men and that I expected them to be like the men in my romance books. I answered him back by saying....Well not everyone is a cheap asshole like you. And further more if I expected men to be like the ones in my book then they'd all be 200 year old Vampires, lol!! He didn't find the humor in that....Wonder why?? Blah!!
I don't have unrealistic expectations for men because frankly I have no expectations at all. I'm tired of waiting and wishing and wondering what's wrong with me. After all this time I know I'm wonderful just as I am :) I'm beautiful, smart and sweet. No one deserves me as I see it. Stand back while I toot my own horn, lol! If a man doesn't like me because I'm too fat, or too short, or too bubbly, or too talkative, or god forbid too old, it HIS LOSS! Frankly I'm tired of it all.
Dating is just another form of rejection that no one needs. Online dating is the devil! It's just another form of rejection but instead of it being in public it's in the comfort of your own home in your jammies. How sad is that? But how else does someone meet another person?? Oh that's right I forgot....People don't meet anymore they just exchange texts and maybe one day you may meet. And then figure out that you've both been lying the whole time.
I'm sure to some that this may sound a bit bitchy, then don't read my crap! Lol. I'm speaking up like you all know I do. It's what makes me.....Well ME! I'm more awesome (yeah that word needs to make the rounds again lol) than most :)